I posted this on tumblr like a month ago but I'm deleting a good chunk of my stuff on there and making it just my (mediocre) poetry. But I love this post and I want it to live. If you're insane and want proof that other people are too, chloekiyoko.tumblr.com
I want to be real. Not like “real” like I’m not being myself… because I am me, and that’s all I can ever be. But I would like to feel permanent. Like if I left someone would would say “hey, I miss that girl. She did something good for my life” Not just fade to the back of peoples memories.
You see, I’ve been thinking about leaving. To college. To life. Whatever. The point is, Alta Loma just isn’t cutting it for me right now. I’ve lived in the same room in the same house for the entirety of my young life. I want to get out.
I want to be in the “real world”. You know, like what all those grown-ups talk about. Like when I graduate high school I’ll get sucked into some vortex, and be spit out in a cubicle wearing an awkwardly fitting pantsuit.
But I’d rather wear ugly pantsuits than be lied to. Because if there’s no vortex and no life changing alteration that comes from basically wasting four years of my life in this purgatorial wasteland, I’m going to be pissed.